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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

"The one about keeping mum.."

Every now and then, we hear people utter the quote "Silence is golden" and often they end up throwing the syntax out of connotation. Sometimes the notion is thrown as an assurance to ourselves; a predicament reminding us constantly that apart from our Asian roots of keeping mum, being silent does not dissuade us of being uninspired and uninformed, bordering monotonous but instead, is a measure of the opposite - we don't feel like muttering something either because we don't find a mutual connection in the conversation at hand, or we just seek excitement of throwing semantics in our heads; rather than voice them out at the mercy of having our thoughts being judged.

The lackluster in one-way communication is that you end up limiting your mentality within a small confined environment. Our perspective and personal views are dynamic; in the passing of time they evolve, as well as adapt towards our surroundings and as we mature and be wiser we inherit an almost arbitrary sense of evaluation on good over bad, right over wrong, fair over unjust. When we engage ourselves in group discussions or two-way conversations we put our ideas out there - and how we handle criticism and cynics sculpts our tolerance and forbearance. Learning to accept one's judgment, be it as deranged and prejudiced governs us prowess to self gratification of our cognition. We are entitled to our own ideas but we choose to acquire others, while adept nor unfaltering, dictate how wise we are. These people, are also those who are more articulate on their ideas in writing rather than in speaking. I can personally vouch on a few whom I've learnt much through their scribbles and manuscripts, more prominently my dear chemoboy.

I have a point to these semantics; I have been nurtured around a family that permits a conducive environment for speaking up. I have parents whom, in their own decree in life inspired my very expressive nature. My childhood was shared with siblings who don't agree by a simple "Yes" nor refuse with a single "No", but instead with a discourse of flowing conversations. In this sense I am lucky, but to digress from this epiphany my interpretations towards silence is still somewhat contradictory. While people may perceive me the happy sanguine to my darling wife Fifah's perfect melancholy, as being a matter of "opposites' attract", she has constantly reminded me that being silent on certain things begs for better prospects on their outcome. Voicing out your opinions like no one's business on everything from global warming to color coordination of towels may appear favorable to building ones character, but there are instances where silence often proves golden enough.

Silence is a choice of not bickering "in the moment"; which garners room for clear and more concise thoughts.

Silence is a choice of not rushing things; which buys time for more absolute and assiduous evaluation.

Silence is a choice of respect; which fuels diplomacy and upholds dignity.

Silence, when appropriately practiced - is often fruitful. People who practice selective-silence, are ones who often end up surprising others. Ikut resmi padi - makin berisi, makin tunduk.

Today I ended up talking to someone whom I've always considered a very silent character, and I have been surprised. Be it the right moment and the right company, you'll find the most rewarding and inspiring conversation in the most silent of characters. So don't worry if you find yourself being the silent one in a crowd - you've just haven't been talking to the right person yet, or no one has grasp to your intellectual discourse at the moment.

Then again, once in a while - put yourself out there and talk to someone. You'll never know what you'll gain.

-JeP

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